I admit it. That’s where I am. A writer without words. It sucks. I hate it. I beat myself up over it. How can I call myself a writer if I don’t write? Why don’t I just do it? Where are the words?
I can’t call this writer’s block. It’s not. It’s fear. Pure and simple blinding fear. When I sit down to write I absolutely freeze. The negative voice in my head is stronger than my will to write at this point.
I hate this.
But how do I beat it? That’s a real question. Suggestions?
For years I’ve admired the amazing leather work of Oberon Designs. I have two Kindle covers for previous Kindle versions. I love those covers. Unfortunately, I’ve not found a good use for either of them now that those Kindle versions are no longer working (or supported).
In December, I decided to splurge and buy myself a composition notebook cover from Oberon. Their pieces are not inexpensive. But they are all handmade to order. They are true, old school craftsmen.
I could not be more happy with my composition notebook cover. It’s truly a work of art.
I have always enjoyed journaling, but now I really look forward to it every morning with this beauty waiting for me on my desk. I carry it with me almost everywhere and jot down ideas. The cover itself inspires me.
What new, or not so new, item are you particularly loving this week? Have you discovered a new service you love? A new book or TV show? Spill!!!
I’m back!! I have no idea where this will go. But I’m planning my editorial calendar for 2018. I’m not sure if I’ll post much between now and January 1. But I do have a plan.
So, stay tuned.
And, I really have not given up on my writing goals. They have been adjusted, however.
More on that later.
If you’re still here, thanks. You deserve a prize.
So my personal goals are set for the year. But my writing goals have been in limbo. Until Thursday night, anyway. During my somewhat weekly writing meeting with Kaye I pretty much defined my #2017WritingGoal: I want to have a submission ready manuscript in one year.
Big freaking goal.
But, when I break it down into smaller goals it looks like this:
Still a HUGE FREAKING GOAL. But it’s doable. Not easy by any estimation, but doable. Actionable. Within my control.
Let’s do this. What are your #2017WritingGoals?
Every Sunday Kaye posts some questions for reflection on her blog. You can check out today’s post here.
Today’s questions made me think hard about this challenge/project and about what place I want writing to have in my life. So I thought I’d share my answers here.
What are your key responsibilities that cannot be put aside for writing?
- Day job
- Pet care (although I do have help with this-I get home before Daniel so must take the dogs out and feed them-that takes 30-45 minutes as soon as I get home)
- Housework (again, I have help, but Daniel can’t do it all, though he will willingly do more)
What priority does writing take in your life?
Writing is important to me. Has been for years. But for so long it has scared me, so I pushed it to the back of my life even when I said I was working. But now I’ve released all those old expectations. Now I just want to write for the sake of writing. So writing is important to me, but not the most important thing.
What would you be willing to give up, for just 30 days, in order to have more time to write?
- Riding the train (I learned over the summer I don’t write well on the train-my good intentions fail miserably-I often doze off or read on the train)
- Mindless TV watching (you know how you turn on the TV just to have background noise but end up binge watching old episodes of Law and Order SVU that you’ve seen 300 times already instead of doing what you intended to do)
- Getting home from work earlier (so giving up the train would get me home about an hour earlier-tested this out last week-what if I take that hour to sit at Panera close to the hospital and wait for traffic to thin out a bit and write)
What are some obligations and commitments you currently have that you can reprioritize and/or reschedule in order to build more writing time into your daily schedule and give your writing the priority in November?
- Easier meals and/or weekend meal prep
- Write at least two hours per day while we’re on staycation the week of 10/31-that should get me a good head start
One thing I’ve recently realized is that I’m okay if my dream of being a traditionally published novelist never happens. I used to think I would die if that never happened. But I have no control over that. What I can control is my work, my writing. And I’ve realized that writing for its own sake is worthwhile for me. But a haphazard approach is not. Therefore, I’m taking this #FirstDraft60 challenge seriously, putting myself into it, and learning to enjoy the journey instead of looking toward the destination.
Sigh…that moment when you realized you antagonist has a more interesting story than your protagonist. Head-desk to infinity.
Thankfully I’m still in the early planning phase of Kaye’s #FirstDraft60 so hopefully I can get this all worked out.
Or I could just make the antagonist the protagonist…
During October and November I’m joining my friend, Kaye, in a writing challenge to complete the first draft of a novel by November 30. We’ll spend October planning and November writing.
If you’re interested in joining the fun check out Kaye’s day one post here.
Blogging seems to be my nemesis. Not sure why. But I’m picking back up where I left off.
Just wish I could do that with the story I was working on in July. Frankly, it’s a mess. Really. A hot, stinking mess. I don’t even want to look at the file, let alone open it. So I haven’t opened it. Since July.
But here I am. Starting right where I sit.
This week writing sucks. I hate my story. I hate trying to make the plot work. I hate even thinking about it. I don’t want to even look at the file.
But I wrote a little bit today anyway.
I had to.
I’m a writer.
What do writers do when writing is hard?
Last week was mostly a bust. At least after Wednesday. I did meet my word count goal of 4k words by bedtime Tuesday. I actually had over 5k! I did blog three days. But on the work out front? Big old fail. I did do my back PT exercises one day and about five minutes of a yoga video one day. But I was sick most of the week with a sinus infection.
So, let’s move from the land of unmet goals to the land full of possibility, AKA next week.
- I want end Friday with 10k words on my Camp NaNo project.
- Thirty minutes of yoga three days during the week.
- Walk thirty minutes three days during the week.
No reason I can’t meet those goals.
And, speaking of Camp NaNo, we have an awesome local leader who has planned many events for us throughout the month. Unfortunately I’ve only been able to attend one event. This morning she had us to her house for yoga and write. Three of us participated. We spent about forty five minutes doing some very gentle beginner yoga. Many years (a couple of decades actually) ago I practiced yoga on a daily basis. I realized today how much I miss it.
After yoga we did a thirty minute word sprint. So awesome to write with friends. Great fellowship.